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When I was in 5th grade I had the biggest crush on this one boy. I wasted so much energy during those years thinking about him but never being able to confess to him. During the last month of 8th grade I told him about my feelings. He told me he liked me too and asked if I wanted to be with him. The next day we broke up because he liked my friend. I didn't cry but I was truly hurt. I entered my freshmen year of high school with many self doubts and self confidence issues. I buried myself in art. I drew and drew and drew in solitude until I can forget about things. I eventually became a very well known artist in the online art community. It was really encouraging. That's how I spent the rest of my highschool life.
I was accepted into a prestigious art college with half scholarship. I was so proud of myself because I didn't think I could do it. All my life I seem to fail at one thing or another. During my 2nd year of college I got carpal tunnel from drawing so much. I took a semester off but during that time I was beyond depressed.I am currently in my 3rd year and I am constantly depressed about my carpal tunnel, college debts, and doubting my skills. I can't even hang out with my friends because our teachers assigns so much homework. Which brings us back to my many self doubts and self confidence issues. I'm worry that when I graduate I won't be able to get a job. There are days where I just sit in my room and crying silently asking myself how did my life got to this point? I wish I was more positive about my life but I am so tired...sometimes I question why I am even here on earth?
#161
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8/7/2012 at 7:39 PM
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Life
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